In hindsight it seems Joshua was foolish in agreeing to the deception. However, how many times have we ourselves fallen for the deception of the “distant country”.
I heard this great story about a guy, let’s call him Matt, who qualified to be on the school football team. Matt was ecstatic –it was a valuable passport to fame, scholarship and girls. The practice days were simply exhilarating for this young teen. The swagger, the cool look of his uniform was intended to attract attention. Matt relished in the Oohh’s and Aahh’s as he walked down the hallway. It was great to be on the team.
Sure enough, the game day arrived. It was time to put into practice all that the team had learned against the strongest opponents in their league. As Matt sat on the bench waiting his turn, he saw his teammates getting battered and bruised. Their once sparkling white uniform was all muddied and dirty, not to mention the smell of sweat that lingered even after they walked past.
The young teen was not so sure of himself anymore. Matt wasn’t keen on getting hurt, getting his uniform dirty or smelling like the Friday evening garbage can. He contemplated running away or slipping quietly out so that no one would notice that he was missing. He prayed like never before; he prayed that his name would not be called. He had revelled in all the glory he had received previously, but now he doubted whether it was even worth it.
That’s when Matt felt the tap on his shoulder. It was the coach. It was his turn next. He was being herded to the slaughterhouse; the time had come. Matt could either get up and be the man he always projected he was, or chicken out, feigning sickness.
Matt chose the latter. The coach didn’t argue, and the next person was sent in.
In spite of all the abuse their bodies suffered that day, their team won. It was a great day for the school and an even greater day for the team.
Congratulations were being given out freely. It was funny that the crowd didn’t seem to mind the dirty uniforms or their ‘stinking’ presence. They were being carried on shoulders, hugged and kissed. They received all the adulation on that day.
In all this, one thing stood out. One look at Matt’s clean uniform and the crowd could tell he had not played. He was a bench warmer. And so, though he was the cleanest and probably the most charming, he was not included in the celebration.
The one thing that Matt would have loved to receive was denied him because he had not played.
It is unfortunate that for many of us this might just ring true at the final count.
We all wish to hear the words from the Lord, “Well done good and faithful servant. You have been faithful in little things…”.
However, the adulation of that Audience of One may be missing because we did not ‘play’.
All that you learned and all the practice you have had will not amount to anything, unless you get down to play the game.
Come on then, get off the bleachers. Join in the play.
“Harvest is plenty, Laborers are few”
Not sure if this is an universal phenomena, but children seem to grow up faster than their parents are willing to let go?
Well I have been struggling with this very dilemma, as my son prepares to leave for University.
Ready or not? Here they go.
So what is the issue?
There is this constant battle between parental stewardship that doesn’t want to let go, and adult responsibility that begs for rational release. I think the issue lies in over-thinking and under-trusting. More about that later.
However, these are times when parents look back to what they would have done differently. In my mind, the only two reason why we as parents may not have regrets, are either because we have not learned from past mistakes, or that we have been too arrogant to admit them. If “to err is human” then the cape of the super parents must be used to cover the face as remorse.
I don’t intend this to be a downhill, slap on the wrist article. I want to applaud parenting by contrasting the dark regrets against the brilliance of the joy and thrill of raising a child. Much like a diamond trader who places the gem against the dark black velvet to capture the nuance. The point though is that a mere human factor in the parenting mix is destined for disaster. It is like a single ingredient recipe. It doesn’t amount to much.
Are they ready?
Parents often worry that their children are yet ill-equipped to face the world.
My parents in their seventies still think so; and while I have given them enough fodder to foster that opinion the mute point is that we must accept.
Accept that they are an independent life, apart from us. That ‘my’ son is a complete human; a man, just like me. Nothing less, and hopefully more.
Accept that we are neither omniscient, nor omnipresent. We do not have all the answers, and can never be at all the places they will be.
Accept some lessons are learned by living, not telling. That they must reinvent the wheel according to their template.
Accept that we could never be perfect parents even with repeated chances.
We reined,trained, and hopefully ingrained, and neither our guilt nor their supposed inexperience must now prevent them.
Are we ready?
The question really is directed at us.
Consider how even from that first day when we brought them home from the hospital, we have only reared them trusting the good Lord for guidance and wisdom.
All of us will acknowledge freely that we are not self-made perfect parents and that it was the grace of God that allowed us to move past colicky nights, broken wrists, school reports, and nightmare-comes-true alarms.
We trusted each day for wisdom and strength. We prayed for character and personality.
Now it is time to test our faith and realize that the wings that were spun with tears and toil will hold as they begin to soar.
Let go, and Let God
It is time to let go.
It is time to know that the same God who led us through parenting will lead them through life.
Learn to let go and see them glide on the strength of answered prayers.
When we do, we will realize it was never us that ultimately held the reins, but God.
He is the one who brought them till here, and He is the one who will guide them till home.
I must remind myself of this truth everyday.
Parental instructions as adornment is probably taking things a little too far by any standards!
Imagine having a note around your neck from your mom reminding you to eat your vegetables at school. Graceful? NEVER. So how does Solomon, the wisest man ever, presume to advise on instructions being a graceful chain around the neck?
Now we can’t deny that an aptly worn chain adds grace. Just the visual – a pearl necklace at an evening out, will have many drooling. Probably therein lies the secret — ‘Aptness’ in wearing the graceful chain of “Instructions”.
So how do we understand all this?
I want to capture three aspects of what we will call “Attitude Adjustments”. When I use the term Parental Instruction, please understand that it could refer to someone significant in your life. Someone who is investing into your life sacrificially.
1. Affection & Assurance:
Just as pearls around a neck screams of someone’s affection (I am making a presumption that pearls are always gifted); Parental instructions are a sign of affection. We read in the Bible: